Funny

To all the guys who read this….. read fully and understand…………..

Tomorrow you may get a working woman, but you should marry her with these facts as well.
Here is a girl, who is as much educated as you are;
Who is earning almost as much as you do;
One, who has dreams and aspirations just as you have because she is as human as you are;

One, who has never entered the kitchen in her life just like you or your Sister haven't, as she was busy in studies and competing in a system that gives no special concession to girls for their culinary achievements.
One, who has lived and loved her parents & brothers & sisters, almost as much as you do for 20-25 years of her life;
One, who has bravely agreed to leave behind all that, her home, people who love her, to adopt your home, your family, your ways and even your family ,name
One, who is somehow expected to be a master-chef from day #1, while you sleep oblivious to her predicament in her new circumstances, environment and that kitchen One, who is expected to make the tea, first thing in the morning and cook food at the end of the day, even if she is as tired as you are, maybe more, and yet never ever expected to complain; to be a servant, a cook, a mother, a wife, even if she doesn't want to; and is learning just like you are as to what you want from her;
and is clumsy and sloppy at times and knows that you won't like it if she is too demanding, or if she learns faster than you;
One, who has her own set of friends, and that includes boys and even men at her workplace too, those, who she knows from school days and yet is willing to put all that on the back-burners to avoid your irrational jealousy, unnecessary competition and your inherent insecurities;
Yes, she can drink and dance just as well as you can, but won't, simply Because you won't like it, even though you say otherwise
One, who can be late from work once in a while when deadlines, just like yours, are to be met;
One, who is doing her level best and wants to make this most important, relationship in her entire life a grand success, if you just help her some and trust her;
One, who just wants one thing from you, as you are the only one she knows in your entire house
your unstinted support, your sensitivities and most importantly -
your understanding, or love, if you may call it.
But not many guys understand this......
appreciate "HER"

Definitions

CIGARETTE: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!
MARRIAGE: It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
LECTURE: An art of transmitting Information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either
CONFERENCE: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present COMPROMISE: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece
TEARS: The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water-power!
DICTIONARY: A place where divorce comes before marriage
CONFERENCE ROOM: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on
ECSTASY: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before
CLASSIC: A book which people praise, but never read
SMILE: A curve that can set a lot of things straight!
OFFICE: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life
YAWN: The only time when some married men ever get to open their mouth
ETC: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do
COMMITTEE: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together
EXPERIENCE: The name men give to their Mistakes
ATOM BOMB: An invention to bring an end to all inventions
PHILOSOPHER: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead
DIPLOMAT: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip
OPPORTUNIST: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river OPTIMIST: A person who while falling from EIFFEL TOWER says in midway "SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"
PESSIMIST: A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in OPPORTUNITY
MISER: A person who lives poor so that he can die RICH!
FATHER: A banker provided by nature
CRIMINAL: A guy no different from the other, unless he gets caught
BOSS: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early
POLITICIAN: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence Later
A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by his bills!!!